Prepare yourself … I’m about to discuss what is actually GOOD about deployment.
I was inspired to write this because a lot of my friends here are struggling with this recent “see you later” much more then they struggled with the “see you later” in May. On the other hand, this is the best I’ve done emotionally during any separation I’ve had with my husband, including the shorter separations that we experienced earlier in our marriage. I don’t know why I’m doing so well, but I have a sneaking suspicion that it’s because I’ve finally found the good in deployments. There isn’t much good, but there are a few very good points:
– The “love letters”, which are now known as emails. I’m not sure any letter is more romantic then a hand written letter that arrives via snail mail, BUT emails provide much faster gratification then snail mail letters. I never in my life thought that the highlight of my day would be receiving an email, but it is during deployment … and I live for those moments. Sure, I’d much rather see my husband face to face, but if he has to be gone, I’m going to love those emails.
– The love renewal that comes at the end of every prolonged separation. We experience months of honeymooning when he gets home. There is nothing that renews love and makes you appreciate a person more then being separated from them, and for us, the longer the separation, the greater the honeymoon when he returns. I look forward to our honeymoon at the end of every deployment.
– Your significant other is doing his job on deployment. Service members who deploy train for deployment every single day that they’re not deployed. On deployment, my husband flies more then any other time … and he loves flying. Not everyday will be a good day for them, especially depending on their job, but deployment is a big part of their job, and this is the time they are truly performing their duty.
– The personal time. I hate being separated from my husband, but I do love the personal time, so long as I’m using it constructively. Because my fall semester hasn’t started yet, I am using this time to work on creative writing projects. I love to write, but I have to do it in silence … that’s when my mind works best. In this tiny base apartment, there is no silence when my husband is home. I can practically hear him breathing from two rooms away. I don’t put 100% effort into my masters program when my husband is home because I’d rather hang out with him. I don’t watch my diet as closely as I should when he’s home because I’d much rather eat what he’s eating and he’s not on a diet. You see my point? Maybe someday when he’s not deployed 6 months of every year I will work on creating personal time for myself when he’s home … but for now, all my personal time happens when he’s gone.
Can any of you think of any good aspects of deployment? There aren’t many, but there must be a few more that I haven’t covered 🙂
And, if you’re still down about deployment, here’s a hilarious video. I’m not sure what is more amazing to me: Jimmy Fallon laying down the harmony, the use of kindergarten classroom “instruments”, or the fact that Meghan Trainer has an incredible voice without the assistance of auto tune. What a talented group of people.